adderall_gal2002

Never been read harder than when my little brother saw this and said ‘I really liked it but YOU’LL love it’. This must be how some trans people felt seeing the Matrix, feeling seen, feeling called out, a generational disillusionment and a deep dysphoria acknowledged. But The Matrix is a power fantasy by directors who love to ape black aesthetics but hold a disdain for us, blame us. This is a cautionary tale, one full of empathy but good god I cannot be this.

I thought I had scheduled an appointment for this morning to talk to a provider about HRT. I spent the previous night wrapped in anxiety about what if things go wrong, what if they change for the worse, what if it won’t ’fix’ me, what if I talk to these people and they call me out, I’m not trans enough, I’m confused. It didn’t go through, I guess. They never called. I scheduled another in two weeks, got the email confirmation. And a part of me was relieved. Passed the buck down. A misunderstanding I can wash my hands of, a perfect excuse I could not be faulted for.

And then I saw this. As if to wash the doubt away. This hollowed me out. I feel raw and exposed and empty like it dug my heart out. I’ve been Owen. I am Owen. I don’t talk right, it’s hard to look people in the eyes, my skin doesn’t fit right, I feel hollow and I look in the mirror and often I see something disgusting and rotting. Owen in the ending is like my biggest nightmare put on screen. I got chicken tenders at the theater, I know, I’m a weirdo, and they asked for the name of the order and I used my birth name. Here. At no risk to me, nobody who knows me, I still couldn’t use Jaycee. I don’t use it at drive throughs. The name I chose, that the people I love and trust call me across the internet, that I use on the dating apps, I couldn’t use. Why? Because I don’t feel like I’ve earned it? Because it doesn’t feel time? There is still time.

I could say more about how this hits as someone who grew up on Buffy and Whedon shows for better and worse in high school despite being born a year before the show premiered, how it hits a nostalgia of a time I knew from behind the screen and then how time skips into now, like a shattering of the escape. I could talk about the attachment formed to a show before the Internet showed you all the fans who loved it like you, seeing yourself in it, projecting onto it what may not be there and reckoning with that as you grow. I could talk about Smith’s aching wound of a performance or Liddy-Paine’s killer monologue, or the breathtaking lighting and cinematography, but all I need to say is what I needed to hear.

There is still time. But that doesn’t mean there’s time to waste. I’m going to do that appointment. I’m going to use my name. I’m going to claw to who I want to be and who I am inch by inch. And like Owen, I may be alone when I take that path but I will be so relieved to be on it, I will know who I am, and that will be in part due to seeing the TV glow.

First part is enjoyable, if a bit badly written, second part after the concert just gets dumber and dumber, no twists at all, lame ending.

It started off interesting, but by the second half it went so horribly wrong and boring.

It’s like M.Night Shyamalan made this movie purely to try make his daughters singing career a thing. Then there’s her acting… so painful to watch.

I really had high hopes for this one, but it’s a massive letdown :( Great to see Josh Hartnett back on the big screens and shirtless. Smash

I enjoyed this, way better than I had been led to believe

This is the 3rd part of the "Alien" saga and I like it a lot. In my opinion it is better than the second part (contrary to almost everybody else's opinion). Why? Because it brings back the horror of "Alien" and drops the unnecessary action-overdose of "Aliens".

I fully get what they were trying to do here and when it worked, it worked really well. Sadly, I felt they didn't have enough ideas to fill these 90 minutes. In theory, following the killer (and the victims) through the woods in an over-the-shoulder-videogamesk perspective sounds like a fresh, tension building gimmick. But there were way too many of these kind of scenes and due to the lack of music, there really wasn't much tension either. I felt really bored after a while, just waiting for the next (mostly really great!) kills to happen.
To my disappointment, the background story was even thinner and (sorry) dumber than a lot of traditional slasher's. If you want to make an artsy kind of slasher, you really need to pull it through, especially story-wise. You can't just take all steoretypes of the genre and try to put the execution into an artsy, slow-cinema corset.

I dunno, this could have been a really cool short film but at least for me, wasn't thought out well enough to fill 90 minutes.

I love Jordan Peele...I was so looking forward to this...and was let down tremendously. The entire Gordy storyline merely seemed like filler and detracted from the rest of the movie. Could've been a lot better imho.

Don't listen to the comments saying this is a great movie because it truly is not.
I would say it starts of promising and makes you think it's building up to something but then the story line just takes a turn for the stupid and you need to switch off and not over think about what's going on.